I like subverting people's minds.
I'm a Christian, with a capital C--important thingie, means I think about how everything goes into getting me into Heaven--and I'm here to tell you a little story, of something I did.
There's this very sweet and pretty girl who I'm trying to catch. She's darling, and good natured, and well mannered. One day I says to her, "I'm a pirate," because I decided a while ago that I am. And she comes back with, "I'm a director. I like to help people know where to go."
That's a nice and polite and kind and sweet sort of thing to say. Unless run through the moi filter.
I send back to her, "You know, everyone I've ever known who said that meant it subversively to put me off my guard because they were secretly plotting to take over the world." Not strictly true, because most of those in my acquaint don't tend to hide that they're trying to take over the world. I certainly don't try to hide that I am, except in strategic ways. It's too early yet for China to be in the know, but there will come a day.
Then, this lovely, kindly, relatively innocent girl, comes back with this: "I hope I'm not trying to take over the world. That would be mean."
She goes on to say, though, "Actually, that is my plan. You're the first person to have me figured out."
I felt good about that. It's remained a sort of running joke twixt us. I felt sort of proud, and still okay with God.
The moral of the story: Christians are fun.